Here I am, once again,
this isn't the first time I realize,
but things are different, lives are changing,
times are switching, life is arranging
to something better I hope.
Where is the hope?
It's not as hidden as it seems,
but still it's covered like an invisible stream.
I know this place all too well,
it makes me want to escape where I fell.
My eyes are now opened to what I was blinded about before,
reality makes itself known to me,
but it never turned out as I thought it would be.
I never expected that this kind of hurt
would almost turn out for the practical worst.
It's ridiculous, it's not right,
my mind screams in defense.
But it's silenced by the reminding
that the forewarnings were never henced.
You can't move when you're clinging to the past.
You can certainly try
but you won't run as fast,
you know it but why
do you keep talking like this?
As if there were so much
you seemed to have missed
that you want to get back one day,
but your desire for the true one isn't completely your all it seems,
because you're not disconnecting from what's dragging you behind,
So you're running in circles,
is there any other way to tell?

Feels like
I can't do anything moving without the preliminary affliction
but I can't do anything standing,
it's like the a underlying contraction
to everything within me and my desire to move,
to run, but here I'm pulled
in every which-way direction.
My eyes flick away,
but they musn't stay astray,
even if it costs to run up ahead
where it's you and me alone, God instead
of anything else.
I'm willing to leave
and leave everything else behind,
discovering new along the way
and growing into who I may.
I know that I've already starting anew,
and I'm doing this all for the glory of you.
Sometimes I'm afraid
that this time here is wasted
that your glory will never be seen
in the way it's suppose to be
because of things out of my control
But your word opposes
because your love never fails,
and no matter whatever else happens,
as I continue this way
with the others I know are in you,
you'll be faithful and just,
and everything will pull through.

Article: Wake Up The Normal Life

"This whole new year has become such a new thing to me. Going into high school after coming out of such a boxed-in world that my tiny middle school had to provide me was a drastic change, and at the same time, I was expecting it. I had spent most of the summer away from my home in Baltimore, Maryland with my dad and his side of the family away from all of my friends in Tennessee. It was good though, like a retreat almost.

Most of all, while I was there, I began seeking God daily and started praying for the high school I was about to enter into- Oakland. I didn't know too much about the school, except for a few people that went there and that it was great in academics, but I wasn't planning on spending four years there to get an education and leave. I wanted God to use me to minister to the people there, and while at first it seemed intimidating, I kept praying on my own time about what God wanted me to do. I had visions and dreams all summer of God just pouring out his spirit on that school and it spreading to the other high schools in my town, Murfreesboro. I had dreams of students coming to know God and his fullness, and it awakened something deeper on the inside of me. It was more than inspiration... it was Passion.

I began blazing with such a passion to reach my school. I spent time in prayer about what God wanted me to do and tried ministering to and helping my new friends and other students. While this was good, not everything was exactly peaches and cream... I started getting stressed and worried because I had too much to do. I was afraid of all of the people that looked down on me, I was trying to keep my grades up, I was paranoid about just the way things would go, and most of all I was stressed about what God wanted me to do. I wasn't sure how he wanted me to start a First Priority club, which is another Christian Club Organization similar to a FCA group. I suffered so many times and felt like just giving up and walking away. I felt like I was losing people and the devil was trying his best to shove me down. It was hard... I even felt like running away at one point from my core prayer group and youth group. But I stood up- I wouldn't allow myself to drop things and leave. I had to keep going. I continued praying and seeking God for answers, and I started coming out of this hard time.

That winter of my freshman year, my youth group took a trip, just like every year, to a youth retreat called The Ramp. This year it was being held closer to home in Chattanooga, Tennessee at the Convention Center. The entire time we were away was another huge eye-opener and it was so refreshing; better than any other Ramp I'd been to. I realized how much passion God had put in me, and the love encounters with Jesus that we all faced were the most amazing thing that had ever happened. It was as if we were in this state of ascending from glory to glory, a never-ending thing. Seeing the passion in all of young people there made me wonder- what if that was what my school looked like? Students worshipping God freely, praying together- signs, wonders, and miracles breaking out all over the campus, a revival... My passion grew, and I came back in the New Year of 2011 ready to make some changes in my walk with God, my relationships, and high-school life. I planned to start waking up earlier in the morning and spending face-time with God in prayer before school, praying for an awakening and for God to reveal his plan for me, and for his peace to rest on me as I went out throughout the day. I planned to change some relationships in life for the better, and that was probably the hardest part at first. I began realizing what it really meant to fight and be in war for passion for God. He delt with a lot inside of me even in such a short period of time, but as I've been taught, we are over-comers.

So really, what was my reward for all of this hectivity?

My passion for God was completely enflamed. I now have a passion for him bigger than I'd ever experienced in my life.

I have a more intimate relationship with Jesus and a love for him deeper than I had ever imagined before.

My friend relationships are better.

I'm now at peace everywhere I go, even when things get rough. 

I also began seeing changes in the people and situations I was praying for... it was like something was stirring inside of my friends for a bigger passion for God. And it was like the people around me began waking up, even just a little, as they're continuing to do so... Their eyes are being opened. It's so exciting seeing them realize what God is wanting to do in our school and waking up. I even spoke with my school's FCA leaders about us having a Christian event at school sometime before the end of the year and together we're all arranging for a band to come and play for a worship service, and for student and guest speakers. Imagine how many people will come to God this year... isn't that awesome?

If you haven't been doing it, I want to encourage anyone who reads this to step up. Get a heart for God, get a heart for your school, whether it be a middle school or college, and get a heart for your city. Get hooked up with prayer groups in your church and youth groups and meet up- it doesn't matter where or when. Pray every day on your personal time and ask God to put those things he wants prayed out on the inside of you, and ask him to impart a passion inside. You can choose whether you want to spend your time being an average comfortable Christian, completely satisfied with spending two hours with God a week and cracking open the old Bible every so often before bed, or whether you want to make a stand and an actual difference wherever you go and building a true love relationship with God and seeking him for answers. He'll reveal things to you if you ask him, he is an unfailing God. Being the same person you were before won't get you anywhere though, so this means you're going to have to drop some of your old habits and sacrifice a few things. This may mean friendships, music, gossip, books, words, addictions, attitudes, lifestyles, and most of all, time. Anything. Are you passionate enough to see God's kingdom fulfilled? Get Moving and pray for an awakening."

By I, Hannah Adkins, The Journalist of Jesus. :)

[Will be submitted to some Teen girl Christian magazine like Brio or Susie whenever I find one.

When I go to IHOPU I wanna start publishing junk like this! :)