Pray for the Middle School Generation.

This is an excerpt I wrote in my journal when I was 12 and in 6th grade.

"There are so many thoughts whirling around in my head right now. I guess I'll start off here.
Ever since I turned 11, my life has become worse than I'd ever imagined. Mainly ever since I entered 6th grade. We have a group of rejects in my grade. I hang out with them because I'm rejected, too. Some non-rejects will come up to me and say hi or just be nice or whatever but most of the time it isn't like that. Me, Nick, Ethan, Levi, Ora, and Savannah tend to stay away from other people. We're not completely rejected, but we group together.
I'm worried about the future a lot. Like I said in the beginning, since turning 11 everything has changed. When I was younger I was a weird, happy, normal kid. And then I wake up to be this confused, sad, put-down person that everyone hates. It feels like I'm so misunderstood and broken. Nobody loves me.
This is another thing to figure out- there has to be a bigger purpose in life. There are many questions here unanswered, but they can't stay that way. I have to answer them, figure them out on my own, but I can't do it alone. I want God to send me a dream... maybe he will if he's still listening.
I wonder how I'll survive. Most people thing suicide is the answer. I don't think it's the answer but sometimes I wish it could all just end. A lot of people think drugs and sex will fix everything, but it doesn't. There must be another way, and I have to figure it out! I'll go til the world's end to find out why I'm here and if I even have a purpose."

 


When I was in middle school, I identified myself as a reject.

Reject; noun:
"The person or thing that is rejected or set aside as inferior in quality."

Inferior.

"One of lesser rank or station or quality; a characteristic of low rank or significance. Falling short of some prescribed norm."


"Sorry, you're not good enough." was the lie that I was fed in that time.
 "Nothing you can do will ever make you qualified to be somebody because YOU don't have what it takes to be whatever you want to be. You don't deserve a purpose in life or a future because you just aren't as good as everyone else. You're below everyone else and you deserve nothing."



Being fed a constant lie is dangerous. It hurts and kills on the inside. When the truth isn't revealed, you become blind, wandering around with your own idea of what the color purple is without ever having seen what it really is in its true state. You start to assume things to your own lack of knowledge.

Lack of knowledge is the death of humanity.

Lack of knowledge was the death of that 12 year old girl from Coffee County Middle School who hung herself last week.
That girl took her life because she didn't know that she had divine purpose. She didn't know that she was fervently loved, and fearfully and wonderfully made by the almighty God. Even though she was bullied and got a lot of crap from the other kids in her school, no one looked her in the eye and told her that SHE was the generation that would shake the earth, and that SHE had a future and a hope. No one told her that she deserves to live because there is a God the loves and desires her heart no matter who people say she is.

I am 17 now and sometimes struggle with the same thought. You're not good enough. But I know that it's all deception. When I encountered the love of Christ for the first time in my life, it literally took these "scales" off of my eyes and I could finally see. I felt like I could breathe without pain on the inside of not understanding who I was. I didn't want to "end it all" anymore. I stopped wanting to slit my wrists. I stopped writing depressing poetry and I stopped crying myself to sleep. Because someone looked and me and said "You have a divine purpose and a God who loves you. You are the generation that will see a revival of love." Not just the warm fuzzy love you feel on the inside, but the love that has the power to break a generational curse that says "You aren't good enough and nobody loves you."

And so this is my prayer: For those who don't know their purpose to encounter the love of God and to rise up into their calling. It's a journey, and no one's journey deserves to be cut short because of deception and lies. We each have a destiny to fulfill and, and it's big.