{Sinking Deep}

Everyone who told me that the second semester of senior year would fly by and "is the craziest part" was absolutely right. Within the past 2 months I've encountered both death and life, sickness and healing, tying of ends, and new beginnings. It's all coming to an end a lot more quickly than I thought it would. Three months ago I was thinking "Why can't this all be over," and I would constantly think, "I'm so over high school." But this past week I would have missed something if I would have skipped over this precious time.
If it were the opposite way, things might have been normal and just fine. Jeremy would still be here on earth, and we would have sang Teenage Dream that Thursday night at the choir show, and every once in a while I wouldn't be eerily scrolling over the last text I sent him that said, "Hey! I'm praying for your heart. I know how tough heartbreak is." I wouldn't pass through the practice area and look over in the empty hall where him and his friends used to sit every day. It's been nostalgic. This Valentine's week was the hardest and most painful. But even still through this time, I would have never seen beauty in how the loss of a loved one could bring so many people together. Not only do we have Hope that Jeremy went to heaven and is living- wait, hello- LIVING with Jesus, but Oakland students and families from all over have grown stronger and closer in this moment. Murfreesboro has been impacted in the middle of its changes and rapid growth by one young, Christ following boy whose life was taken tragically. I had never seen so many kids praying and standing together so close in one week. Not to say that tragedies must happen in order to bring people closer, but perhaps God used pain for beauty. It says in Isaiah that he will trade His beauty for our ashes, and the oil of His joy for our mourning. He is ready and willing to turn any situation that is difficult into something that can be worth more than what we had. I love that about Him. 

 

Friday night, I walked into the Experience sanctuary in the middle of worship and approached another beautiful artistic display for worship night #4. The board stretched out far and wide, and the words "Sinking Deep" was painted in the center on the horizon of a vast ocean against a sky. Sticky notes of prayer requests were all on the painting's ocean. As the night continued I realized how many Oakland students were represented. At least 30 if not 40 students from OHS had spent their Friday night not out partying or running around, but at the feet of Jesus beside their peers. Later on, I watched with tears in my eyes some of my friends that I see in the hallways, in class, and at SLAB baptize eachother that night as an outward representation of their inward transformation. And it isn't even over yet. None of this is over. More and more of my friends are going to get saved at Oakland, even after I graduate. Then it's just going to keep going after our class leaves because of the inspiration and drive being passed on to each class. Who knows what Murfreesboro will look like after these next few years. My job in this lifetime is to make my city look like a city that loves Jesus. And so it shall be.

And Just to throw it out there in the middle of all these crazy things, Last week I received my acceptance letter to IHOPU. I'm not going to study micro-chemistry or become a bio-engineer, or a teacher, or even a business major. I'm going to grow and find myself, study Jesus, and find out how I can partner with others to reach the world. And I'm going to study music. Whatever they have for me, I know I need it and so does God. Moving out in 5 months is an exciting and tragic thought at the same time. But it's so very real, and it's happening.

So let me sink deep over these next 3 months- in These final, small hours that I have in high school. Let me sink deeper and deeper into his love, grace and sweet mercies, so that people might follow and get caught up in His story- the  greatest love story ever told.