Beautiful Mess

Finding your heart full at the end of a challenging week is encouraging, because you know that no matter what is happening, God is still showing you that He's listening.

This past week in Chapel, one of the young speakers was talking about the vulnerability of the prodigal's son, and how it takes vulnerability for us to fully shine our light. He took the mic, and after a short moment, confessed something to everyone that had really brought his walk with God into a valley. He told us that sexual temptation had overtaken him time and time again, and with tears in his eyes, he explained how humble he was that such a loving God would choose to not only redeem, but unconditionally love him regardless of our actions, no matter how intense they are. During the time that he told part of his testimony, the room fell completely silent. Any kind of shuffling had stopped, and in one accord, all eyes were turned toward the speaker in unified respect that someone would reveal such a vulnerable topic in front of a large group of people. 

What struck me was the intensity of how transparent this guy was. He didn't seem to care if people in the crowd judged Him. Some of the people probably were. Some maybe weren't. Maybe others felt the same pain that He did. 

During this time, I found my biggest struggle is being vulnerable and transparent with everyone around me, no matter who they are. I will confess that this past year, I have found myself in the middle of situations that I would have never imagined before. I have covered dirt up. I've kept secrets from my parents, my family, and my former church leaders, fearing that if I told them what was going on, then they would lose hope in me or would be disappointed in me. Since coming to Lee, I have started a new chapter, but have covered up a lot of struggles that I've been having since I've been here. I have pretended that I'm fine when I'm not, because that's what I did back at home. I would put a patch over an infection and wouldn't allow anyone to reach inside and help me, including the Lord himself. And sitting in chapel, I found out from God that it would only hurt me in the end. I can't keep things bottled up anymore. I can't cover these wounds any longer. In order to be free, I have to be transparent, and honest. Because light can only shine through something that is transparent.

This week, I have learned that striving for perfection isn't the testimony of being a Christian. The story is that we are so lost and broken- that we completely turn our backs, but He chooses to still love and redeem us with open arms.



Here's a bit of my week:

Family photos :)

Sharing the love and experience from 301

                       This is Danielle, and she has taught me that we're all beautiful messes. I have been blessed beyond words to befriend this girl over the past month. Get this- she's from Murfreesboro, but we met after we got to Lee. God has his way of putting people in our paths, and this is no coincidence. Her love for God is incredible, and she's got a big heart and a big future ahead of her full of the wonders of His great love. I totally can't wait to see what the Lord does through her over the next few years- wherever he takes her, and wherever she decides to go. 

The weekend started our rough, but it has ended with a full heart. Sometimes you just need friends to encourage you along the way. 

Have a good week, friends. Be loved. and Be vulnerable.