Keep singing, even when it's raining...

Keep singing.
Even when it looks like things aren't going to be the same

Just keep singing

When no one else wants to anymore,

when all hope seems lost.

Keep singing

even if you're singing 

in the rain.

Even if you're singing 

by yourself 

Honestly, I've felt really down since 7th period today. 

I love singing with people and I love having fun while we're doing it. It really pains me that things are out of sync though. Whatever is out of sync, I know that it's something that goes beyond a different teacher. Something that goes beyond a different and new group. Something beyond different standards. Maybe it's everyone. Maybe we've just got to get motivated and be happy or something. I don't want to feel a negative atmosphere whenever I walk into the classroom anymore. I've let it get to me lately, and for the past few classes I've walked out feeling worse than when I walked in. Singing is totally not suppose to make you feel that way and it's definitely not why I wanted to be in Chamber Choir! Singing is something that is positive and expressive. Isn't that what singing is all about? Expressing yourself and sharing something with the people around you? Even when you sing a sad song, you're releasing something from the inside of you and expressing your heart in such a way that you can express no other way. Last year things were great, but it wasn't just because we had a different teacher. There's something else that made things the way they were, and something else that cause everything to change from then to now. I wish I could pin-point it, but it's more complicated than a simple answer. I pray that this phase passes over and that things get better and that things are okay. I can't stand hopeless situations, because shouldn't exist. Ever. There's always hope for things to get better and I feel like that's something we toss around and throw away easily...

 I want to look forward to going to choir and singing with people and having fun, not being afraid to walk in because the sad and tense atmosphere in the room. Choir means a lot to me...

You Make Beautiful Things...

(Song of the Week) Beautiful Things by Gungor





When people ask me how I know that God and real, this is my one answer: Having the faith in him, trusting him, watching him do amazing things and sharing the testimony of that faith.
He's faithful, all the way through until the end. I know that this is a very redundant statement that comes out of my mouth, goes on my twitter, and something that I often post on here, but no matter how much I write it or say it, it will never measure up to how real and how good he really is. He is more than a void of air. He's more real than the sky above us or the ground beneath us. His very breath is what we are living in.

Press on when the journey is long. Press on when it gets difficult. Press on even when darkness is all around you. Press on even when there is not a light at the end of the tunnel. Press on even when you're tired of pressing and all you want to do is shut the world out and wade in this pool of melancholy and negativity. Because what will happen when you finally reach the other side is immeasurable. You will never know what the other side will look like until you press on, and once you reach the other side, you will see things you never knew you could before. You will see beautiful things, because he makes all things new and beautiful. He crafts beauty out of what was once a bare tree, waiting for Spring to come.

This is what I've come to learn within the past three months, after going through a season of winter. It's time for new things that I never expected to begin. Don't get caught up in the season, because there is an end to it and a beginning of something new when we're patient and ever pressing forward for more of his love and knowledge.
He answers when we call upon him. He is always speaking; we are to listen. He is always answering- we are to seek. He is always listening- we just have to knock.

Faith Triumphs in Trouble

Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom also we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.

-Romans 5:1-5

I lift my eyes unto the Hills.

I didn't realize how much getting my wisdom teeth out would drain me, but it has. Soon enough routine will set in again, as much as it can.

One of the things I've been experiencing in my walk with God is getting to know other people and getting a wider perspective of who God is through them. Hearing their personal testimonies, stories, and building onto each other. This seems to be what is setting in for the year ahead, and even right now it's huge... I'm excited to see what else is going to happen in the near future. I know big things will only get bigger, because our God is truly amazing!

Decisions can be tough sometimes, but I know that he will never steer me wrong. So I'm trusting him and learning to do so more and more every single day, one step at a time.

Stepping out of our boxes and breaking out of the shell can be the most life-changing experience and the biggest step we could ever take. But unless we do it head-on, how will we know what can happen? How will we know how much God's glory will burst through unless we take that one step? Is it worth it?

Consistent Prayer is so vital. The stereotype is that it may be a bit much, but we don't really understand what it means to throw a few prayers up and then turn God off. It's time for an inner awakening, from the inside out. We have to let him breathe his breath of life into our hearts and keep in touch with him consistently every day, like a close friend. He is the closest friend we will ever have.

My words are few tonight. He has shown himself amazing to me even more this week, even through persecution that has caused me to be weary. But his presence refreshes and his love never fails.

Thank you for the encouraging words this week. Don't forget to lift someone up today as you go throughout your day. :)

"I will lift up my eyes unto the hills— 

Where does my help come from? 

 My help comes from the Lord,
Who made heaven and earth."

-Psalm 121:1-2

From Then to Now. Here's to Life, and Life more Abundantly.

When I'm bored and not feeling well, but so tired of sleeping, I tend to go through my old blog posts and read other blogs to kill the time. As I leafed through some posts from last year, I came across this one.


 http://wakeupthenormallife.blogspot.com/2011/09/that-part-of-you-on-inside.html



 I wrote that old post as I sat in my old bedroom, in my old house, with formally new experiences wrapping themselves around my brain, formally new friends crossing my paths, formally new "googely-eye" feelings making their way into my young heart, and formally regretful and frustrated feelings taking their place within me. I was wrapped up in the moment. I suppose we have all been here.

All of these things have dissipated now, as most things do over a year time period. New things have replaced them. It's almost like I lost myself then, but I found myself over the summer. And so far into the school year, because of the decisions I made, I haven't lost myself, but rather found that part deep inside that went missing for a while there on and off. My life is no longer consumed with JROTC and trying to impress other people. The pride and anger I had felt is gone. My life is no longer consumed with trying to be someone I'm not. My life is no longer consumed with the worthless things I pursued at full speed. (And perhapse if I hadn't done that I wouldn't be where I am now.)

Now things are toned down. Even in the midst of being busy, things have fallen into place. I feel like I found myself again after so long of trying to figure things out. Nowdays I pull my mat out of my closet and lay in the front yard with a cup of chai-tea for a nap (when weather permits as fall is setting in) or I bring my books and homework out there. My time has gone from being consumed with people that I don't often talk to much anymore and things that I was caught up in to spending more of my time with homework, books, a paper and pen and practicing music when I'm not at work. And when I'm not doing those things, My time is full of more family activities and some well-needed friend time when I'm able to encounter that...



As things have changed, my family is really all that I have left. Well, my blood family and my church family at least. So many new faces are at school that I don't quite see the old ones as often anymore, although I have made many acquaintances. Perhaps those can become life-long friendships. If I can find some coffee-drinking, writing, chill, adventurous, Jesus-loving friends. I like to make new friends, but, as strange as it sounds, sometimes I forget how to, as I've held tight friendships for so long that have now become loose. I have to remember to reach out and talk to others instead of waiting for them to come to me. I have to remember to let the love of Christ speak.





I'm actually really excited for Big Brothers Big Sisters to start up at Oakland. I really do love kids and it's been so long since I've taught Kids Church at WSC. My first lesson there since May is this Sunday though, and I'll be really glad to be around my little ones again. They've changed my life :)

Now for some pictures that I have to catch up on. Enjoy

This is Josiah

And his big sister Ellie with one of the twins (Maddie if I'm not mistaken) behind him. Ellie is my little Gilmore Girl. She looks and acts like a kid version of Rory. :)

 

This was yesterday morning when our guest speaker did a corporate calling for those who wanted the infilling of the holy spirit. Six new faces came up. Pretty exciting!

If anything has grown over the past year, it's definitely been Word and Spirit church. Although our youth group has gone through its changes and some people have left because of graduation and some new middle schoolers have moved up, there's an entire new set of people on our horizon. Our attendance has gone from about 150 to about 230 within the past six months. Our youth group had to move to the church office because the kid's classrooms are over flowing And the large field that sits next door to our small church building is still looking hopeful. Things are looking pretty bright...

 

Although I love doing this, some mornings I'm greatful to be in the congregation receiving from God. I love our team. We may not have a complete, full live band yet, but we believe that we will soon. In the mean-time we've added some new faces and new songs. His glory is worth it. :)

I've developed a new love for my town after staying long weeks away during the summer. I love you, Murfreesboro. I love you with all of my heart. And though I may depart every so often, you will always be in my heart.

 

We will learn the stupidity of Algebra, Matt. You and I both. We can get through this together.

 

To my special birthday neice, Emily. Ten years fly by all at once.

 

 It's okay Carrie, you can be my new BFF. Mom and Angie can work their things out. :)

 

Thankfully she gives me this look nowdays instead of spanking me.

Sometimes Angie and I need days like these to spend some sister-love time. Here's to a fall season full of fuzzy socks and hoodies.

I know this picture is about two years old. But I guess it's been a while since we've gotten a good picture. Billy, I miss you with all of my heart. Come home soon. I hope the army is being good to you. :)

Harry, I couldn't find a picture of you on my laptop. But I will take a picture with you and blog it. (after my face stops swelling). You've changed my life. You mean more to me than how I acted before. And although you won't read this, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for being afraid to get close. But now that fear is gone, replaced by the love of Christ. I love you and I would rather not have any other brother because you're the best and there is no one like you. You're happy, you're a book full of intelligence that I could never grasp and you say the silliest things sometimes. Anytime I bring food home from work, you can have it as long as you beat Angie to it. Here's to a fresh love of a fresh day. I will love you every single day. The past is gone and today is new. I hope to show you God's love every day as I'm learning it myself. I hope to inspire you.



Family love, you mean more to me now than anything.