You show me the way to life.

I love serving Jesus. No one can compare to him. No matter how much we try to replace him with other things in the world, there is nothing like being in his presence and spending time in communion with him and reading his word and learning from him. He teaches us things we forget and things we have never learned or known every day, and no matter what things look like in the end, he is the only one who can show us which way to go.


Tonight I wanted to share some things God taught me today about health.
Yesterday I gave blood. I was a little apprehensive since it was my first time, and I even had a bad feeling about doing it, knowing that my allergies were already bugging me that day, but decided to go for it anyway because I was already on the bus (literally). Let's say the experience was a lot more unpleasant than I expected. I almost passed out 3 times and remained sick and nauseous for the rest of the day. I felt good having helped someone somewhere out there who needed blood, but at the same time I felt terrible for the rest of the night, started running a fever and couldn't go to school today or finish any work that needed to get done. I failed people that were counting on me today when I could have prevented it. I couldn't sing for worship tonight because my throat was sore. I've constantly been sick this year more than any other year and so my immune system was probably not strong enough for me to give blood.

The truth is that most of the time I spend my time in concern for others and of others rather than myself. This seems kind of selfless at first glance, but isn't always a good thing. I was talking to my worship leader Juan tonight about it, and I loved his response. "Remember to put the oxygen mask on before putting anyone elses' on. It helps a lot."
Simple, right? Even a little sarcastic. But it's really something I forget about constantly and something that they have to put on the instruction card when flying with Southwest.

Put it this way. If I tell everyone that I represent Christ, but I'm constantly sick, wasting my money and not being wise with it and wasting time, never finishing my school work and on top of all of that not eating right or taking vitamins and trying to take care of everyone else, then what does that say about me as someone who represents Jesus? I believe that it's time for me to fix some things. Most people see my generation as self-absorbed and irresponsible. I don't want to be irresponsible. I'm tired of losing things and forgetting things so easily. It's time to take on a toll of being more responsible for myself and not worrying about everyone else. Not to say that in a selfish way, but in order to help the people in school or in Kenya when I leave, I have to be healthy and fit to reach out. And I think that all of this will start with eating right, exercising more often and taking vitamins. I need to start taking care of my temple so that God can use me more. Things are going to have to change, and I'm going to make them change by choice. I'm going to start caring for myself more and spending more time with God so that I know how to reach out. I'm going to start budgeting my money correctly so that I can save for a car. I'm determined to make this change this year. And if you see any things that you need to change in your lifestyle or walk with God- take a break, write things down and be determined to keep up with it. It can be difficult, but by taking care of ourselves first we make room for others. Take care of the root to grow the tree and reap the fruit. :)

Thank you Jesus for helping me to be responsible and for helping me to stay strong.