It's been almost a week since I've come to Baltimore for part of my summer...
It's been productive. (:
I've been getting closer to God again and finishing up reading some of my Mike Bickle teaching book... one thing that has really caught my attention this past week is getting into fasting. I've always known it to be important and knew in my mind that it was a time of getting closer to God, but I never really comprehended it having not experienced it in its fullness (and I still have a long way to go).
This past Sunday I decided that it would be a good time to fast and had a confirmation from the holy spirit after praying about it... So I went on a fast for 12 hours, no food... not that big of a deal but I've never gone 12 hours without food before so it was a step for step one into a fasting lifestyle.
In that time I spent time with God- there was something about it... some people think it's a cult or brainwashing thing or whatever to fast, but really it isn't. John the Baptist fasted, Jesus fasted, and his disciples fasted as well, and in that time of fasting many things were accomplished as far as communication with God and getting more attuned to his heart and voice.
It's putting yourself in a time of sacrifice from one of your body's most vital sources of functioning in order to attune yourself to the voice of the holy spirit and to hear from God. Our bodies can go DAYS without food and at least 3 days without water. We were made to fast.
In this time it felt that I went twice the speed in half the time- for real. I want to fast more than 12 hours and I want to make it more a part of my lifestyle as a seeker of Jesus. This is a way of getting clearer vision of who he is and who I need to be, and one thing I desire of the Lord- that I can seek the face of God and dwell in his temple.
Tonight I went to the Agape house- the youth group at my dad's church, Edgemere Church of God. When I came in they were playing Rooftops by Jesus Culture- really made my evening. :) The evening service was a bit different because the youth pastor's father has been sick so they haven't been for a little while, but one of the church leaders talked about not giving up on our dreams.
This evening and the songs they sang on Sunday bring back so many memories for me. When I was 13 staying here I visited the Agape house (I was too young to be in there but no one could tell, lol) and invited my friend Justin. One of the youth pastors wanted to pray over us and so everyone went to the front, and the youth band started singing Wrap me in your Arms and I remember encountering God right there with tears running down my face praying in the holy spirit and the youth pastor coming and laying hands on me.
In that time when I was 13 I felt like I'd messed up so bad that summer, as if I'd done something that God couldn't forgive me of, and this wasn't too long after repenting of that and I still felt like a toll had been taken on me emotionally. But in that moment it was like God was taking a Banner of love and wrapping it around me, reminding me that he will always love me even through my imperfections and that I was forgiven and that I would have to move on and come deeper into him...
I know through out the past few summers I've visited and through knowing that that was the church I was born into that I felt a connection with Edgemere's church body. Even while I'm in Tennessee I'll feel at times God unctioning me to pray for the pastors, head leaders, musicians and the church body there. God's really alive in that church and I know God will do great things there. (:
I'll keep everyone updated... 3 and a half weeks left here now. I'll make the best of it. And afterward I'm so looking forward to youth camp and Kid's camp... then Sophomore year! (Woot!)
Goodnight world:) Good Bless.
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