Kick-back.

I probably won't remember writing this for the next few days since I'm being sedated with Anesthesia tomorrow afternoon for wisdom tooth surgery. But before that happens, I felt tonight that I should kick back and share something with whoever decides to come across this blog post.

Jesus Christ: Creator, Savior, Redeemer, Friend, Son of God, Righteousness, Perfection, Love. The list goes on.

... Lover and Romancer.

Are those two ideal words you would initially add to that list? Why or why not?

We can be saved and encounter God in mighty ways through things he does in our lives, families, through our friends, in our situations, et cetera. But is that really the end of the story? ...Well, no. It's not. There's endless areas of God's awesomeness that we will always tap into because his love is pretty much an endless ocean. I have never been to parts of that ocean, reader. And there are parts you haven't accessed, either. Perhaps you're one who is content floating on the surface. Or maybe you're one who knows there's something more, who dunks their head beneath the surface to get a glimpse, but who quickly bobs up and down uncertainly or by accident. Perhaps you've already submerged yourself into that ocean and dive deeper and deeper still, every single day. Whatever the background, we're all different, and you will always have a choice.

Anyhow, let's see... Romancer and Lover... I didn't quite pictures these adjectives with Jesus honestly until I was layed out on the floor at a youth conference about a year and a half ago. I had nothing left to give. At the time I had already given so much of myself, and lost friendships, and was going through things that I didn't really understand. All I could do was lay there and cry and ask God for more of him and less of myself. Because I won't get more of him by being full of nothing but me, myself and I. And when I came to this point of realization..... I can't even explain it in words the love of Christ that overtook my heart. It's called divine encounter. The point where you've hit rock bottom and all you can do is look up. Or the point where you've reached the top of the atmosphere and you just can't take to be trapped beneath a bubble anymore, so with full force you burst through the atmosphere with nothing holding you back anymore from the space beyond. Liberation.

Once we realize that Jesus Christ came not only to set us free, but that we were seriously made to be encountered with love so deep on a daily basis, it shakes things. This is the point where the chains of the same sin that binds us over and over again completely break off and are left behind. This is the point when people begin mocking you and calling you a quitter, and with slight discouragement at first you walk away, head hanging low, but you stop in your tracks and remember that that isn't who you are, because you find who you are/your Identity in the word and love of Christ. This is the daily process of dying to ourselves and coming alive in the Love of Christ and living a lifestyle of love rather than drifting through life wishing we had more. Friend, I don't know why I'm writing this, but maybe you aren't sure what the next step is. I'm telling you that if you do this one thing (which maybe you aren't used to, but it works every time, with promise) and get down on your knees in your bedroom at night and turn your worship music on and open your bible and close your eyes and say "God, I'm open to receive your important words and your love for me, and I thank you for helping me to understand what you want me to do next." then things will happen. You can't ask God for something and not expect it to happen. He does what he says. When we speak to him, we move his heart, because he loves us. Because he loves you.

He is our lover and romancer... not the creepy kind like when you're 25 and not married and you say "I don't need an earthly husband, because Jesus is my husband forever!"... but the kind where you come in your room at night and he's there, tenderly waiting for you to come to him and talk to him. He's the kind when you don't know what to do next he wraps you in his everlasting embrace. He's the kind when you've given yourself away to the things of this world that will still be persistent to pursue you... he wants your gaze to be fixed on him. He wants your full devotion.

My goal is to work on these things this week. To spend time with God while recovering and to refresh my mind and heart to his word and presence... I want a heart that is fully in love with Jesus, because that's my testimony, and nothing else.

Have a beautiful week and be sure to spend plenty of time relaxing and enjoying the weather before it gets too cold. :)

Sincerely.